I got back from eleven days in Oakland County Jail at approximately 2:40 this morning. Ugh. Seriously fml.
If you want to know where your heart is look to where you mind goes when it wanders.
It’s crazy how slow time passes when you have nothing but food to eat, and cigarettes to smoke. I’m very anxious lately. I make it a point to text supportive people. I have been attending some treatment program since January 14th. I have been to two shitty and awkward AA meetings. I have been breathalyzing every morning since February 6th. I have a job interview at The Gap on Tuesday. And I feel like my mental health is finally coming together. But I also might go to jail on Thursday. I’ve also come to terms with that. I think I would get 30 days but it could be 90. I could refocus my mental health in an environment where people’s normally degrade… Afterwards, I would be free from the law. Finally. If I do not go to jail, I will still have to wake up every morning until March 6th to breathalyze, and attend AA meetings every week for 6 months. Hell comes in many forms for people.
I would have a harder time finding a job after I’m out though. Things might not be opportune in the universe after 30 days.
Part of me wants to just be done with this…